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Do you ever realize that someone when they share a story to you and every single time he/she will be innocent in their story? They make a story where always people injustice to them. If your answer is yes let me explain why they do something like this. What is the reason behind this?
Actually there is no reason but they have a mentality and
This type of mentality called VICTIM MENTALITY.
What is victim mentality?
According to Harley’s therapy (2006) “Having a ‘victim mentality’ means you blame your challenges in life on others around you, even if you can’t prove their negative actions. You might also blame many things on circumstances, which you see as always unfair”.
We all have our ups and downs in life. Bad things might happen to you or people you know on a daily basis. But there are some people who claim it is never their fault. They argue that they have no control over the tough situations and problems they encounter. It is simply always happening to them. People who constantly blame other people or situations for the events in their lives have a victim mentality.
[At this point I am going to introduce some sign of victim mentality]
->Signs You Have a Victim Mentality
Let me give some example about this
1. Always have something go wrong in their life
2. All the conversations end up around their problems
3. They always brace for the worst
4. Feel helpless in situations and feel that there is nothing they can do about it.
5. They mainly focus on negative events and disappointments.
6. They seem addicted to misery and chaos
7. They act like a Martyr
8. They take pleasure in blaming others for what happened
As you can see, it can have a detrimental effect on those with this mindset. Their stories may be very true but how they view and respond to their situations causes them to live in this mindset.
How is a victim mentality created?
“Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about”
[~Wendy Mass~]
According to “Kets de Vries”(2012)”Much of what creates victim mindset is the foundation within the family of origin.
-If someone grow up with the family where everyone always complain and complain. They complaining for every single things every negative point either they can focused on positive things. It will also effect our mentality.
- Another way to form this mentality is if a child has a codependent relationship with their parents. The child could feel responsible for their care and well being. They might start to believe that they are in charge of their parent’s happiness. The child can start to think that the only way to earn love or attention is if you are sick or weak, which could follow them into their adulthood creating the victim mentality
Lot’s of cause already exist but most of the case those are the reason for Victim Mentality.
What is the benefit of Victim Mentality?
The victim mindset will have you dancing with the devil, then complaining that you’re in hell.
[~ Steve Maraboli ~]
1.The victim gets to blame others and never take responsibility for their actions.
2.The victim gets to have power over others.
3. The victim gets to stay in their comfort zone.
How to Stop Being the Victim?
1.Take responsibility-
If the victim can start to take ownership of their actions or where they are today. They can start to regain power over their life again and start to focus on what they can do next to make it better instead of waiting for the next thing or person to blame.
2.Gratitude-
When one focuses on what they are grateful for, there is no room to be a victim. By changing this perspective from what they are missing to what they have and can truly shift their mindset.
3.Self-care and compassion-
Victim mentalities are subconsciously adopted as a way to cope, often from past trauma. Be compassionate to yourself in your recovery. Practice self-care and self-love.
4.Educate yourself-
Read books about the victim mentality and how it affects your life. Consider seeking therapy. The more you educate yourself on the topic, the more likely you are to stay on track with your recovery and avoid going back to your old way of thinking.
5.Forgiving and letting go-
When they can learn to forgive and release their resentment and bitterness towards others and replace those feelings with compassion and understanding, it will help to move them out of the victim mentality.
Conclusion
Victim mentality is learned behavior.
In other words, it’s not something you’re born with. It's something you learn in a social environment. It could be learned from family members or the result of trauma. However, you have the power to overcome it. Take the first steps in the following ways and will become more enthusiastic and mindful person.
Thank You.

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